2010: The year I spend on my feet (Welcome!)

Sitting in a chair all day sucks. No really, it does. I spent the last two or three years at a job in a dark cave, where, although I worked very hard, I still sat for ten hours a day, then sat in my car for two more, then sat on the couch for five more, then collapsed in bed for seven. Rise, rinse, repeat, and I just discovered the last step is "DIE". Yeah, it seems that even if you go to the gym and work out faithfully, you're still gonna die at the same awful rate from heart failure and other horrors if you sit most of the day.

So, this year, I'm standing up. All day. Apparently, the simple act of standing up for the majority of the day doubles your metabolic rate and helps you avoid all those nasty health problems associated with being a total slug. I've been doing it for two weeks so far, and I can report that I have already lost two pounds (no trips to the gym or change of diet) and I feel remarkably less sluglike than even a few weeks ago (my scientific method for measuring sluggishness is simple observation of work output: I manage to write at a consistent rate of one to five pages a day while sitting, but ten to twenty pages a day while standing. How about THAT.) No more stiff back and shoulders, greatly improved circulation in the legs (who wants ugly varicose veins? Not me.)

Now, I'm not the only one who's gotten wise to this idea. They even make fancy desks that hoist your stuff up to chest level so you can work on your feet. Me? I just threw a packing box and The Complete Works of Jane Austen on my kitchen table, plunked my laptop on top, and boom, stand-up workspace. It's a miracle of engineering.

Some of you might tremble and whimper, "But I don't wanna stand up all day. That sounds exhausting." Try it for a week. I dare you. I suspected I would feel a positive difference, because I remembered feeling much more energetic and fit back when I was a high school teacher and had to be on my feet all day. But you have to experiment for yourself. Just get a box or a stack of books, easy peasy. Your boss won't care, come on, it'll make you more productive. I dare ya.

Meet 2010 on your feet, soldiers. And a Happy New Year to you all.